Sometimes I feel that I hate you. You have interrupted my career, cost me my livelihood, made for numerous fights about money and the lack thereof now that I can no longer work full-time. I am tired.
I am tired of being tired, tired of having to explain why it is that I do not understand this or can no longer do that safely. I am tired of the betrayal. You robbed me. Damn you.
I am no saint. There is never a time when I feel that I love you. But there are times when I know that I notice the little things more-- the touch of a lover, the song of a bird, flowers blooming, weather shifts, the moon. I am alive and that sure beats the alternative.
Sometimes I tell myself and others that my brain's name is now Briella-- still brilliant but a bit twisted and sideways.
Sometimes I mourn the old, sometimes I celebrate the new, sometimes I can just be.
sapphoq healing tbi