Falling and Physical Therapy Again

I've succeeded in injuring my back twice in a month.  After the first injury, there was a spot in the middle of my lower back that had spasms for three weeks.  Out came the TENS Unit.  I was glad that I had one [purchased for me after the motor vehicle accident which had insulted my brain into her present condition].  

A few days after the spasms stopped, I fell.  When I do fall, I tend to fall to the right.  I am still having trouble with uneven ground.  This time, I fell on my back.  I was not a happy camper.  My neck muscles kicked into automatic and strained forward in order to avoid a whiplash.  A week after this, I consented to sign up for physical therapy.

I had my eval this week.  I learned several things.  There was good news and not so good news.  The good news was that my hips were fairly strong and that the p.t. folks would work with me on some balance exercises and my uneven ground issue.  The bad news was that my falling had more to do with my perception problems [courtesy of the brain damage... le sigh] and that my right side, all these years later, was still showing evidence of having been far more injured during the accident than my left side.  I've worked very hard through the years and to find out that bit of news did not exactly thrill me.  Brain damage sucks.  Oh well.  I am alive to complain about it.  That is something.  Beats the alternative.

I was given a sheet of exercises to do at home.  That was something I had requested.  Some of them target the latest back injury.  Some of them target my very tight hamstrings.  Yeah, I did them today.  Yes, when I go to physical therapy I work very hard to derive the greatest benefit from it that I can.

Meanwhile, I have renewed my commitment to myself in terms of healthy eating habits, sleep, and exercise.  I am worth it.  This body is not the body that I came into the world with.  Likewise, Briella [still brilliant but a bit sideways] is not the brain that I came into the world with.  Shit happens and it is up to me to make the best of it.  Whining is ineffective.  I cannot be who I used to be.  I might as well keep striving to do the best I can with this particular set of cards that I've been dealt with.

sapphoq healing t.b.i. says:  I've done my share of screaming and crying.  I've been at this for quite awhile.  The grief and sorrow that I went through after realizing that my battered brain was not going to revert to the brain that I used to know was a very necessary grief and sorrow.  Because I've been at this for quite awhile, I am no longer overwhelmed by the impact that my traumatic brain injury has on my life.  Aside from the occasional bad moment, I pretty much keep myself moving forward as best I can these days.