Poison Ivy

     I've been a hiker and backpacker for a number of years, both before and after the scrambling of my brain that occurred during my motor vehicle accident. My brain's name is Briella-- still brilliant but a bit sideways. Vision begins in the brain. Besides having double vision in one eye and now having face blindness [I would say "suffering from" only I don't feel like I am suffering from anything], I am apparently no longer able to recognize poison ivy.

     Most fortunately, some years ago I had a flat-coated retriever who was absolutely nuts about the stuff. Dogs are generally not allergic to poison ivy. He used to roll in it, dig it up, toss it around, eat it. Then I would break out in that certain rash. The first summer with him, I had poison ivy six times. I figure that dog is the reason why I have very mild reactions to the leaves of three now.

     I've been weeding in the garden. During the first few years of living with my t.b.i., I purchased several berry bushes and planted them. I don't remember what kind of berry bushes they were. This is a problem now. I do have a rather prolific vine thing growing in the plot where I plopped the berry bushes. It is currently full of white flowers. When I walk by it, I feel little itches on my skin. [There is a particular weed in my garden too that causes the little itches but which I know is not poison ivy]. I go inside and I scrub my arms and hands and then that's the end of it. 

     I've never eaten the berries off of the prolific vine because I cannot tell if the thing is a version of poison ivy or if it is some kind of raspberry or something. This week, I will hunt through my plant identification books in hopes of figuring out what the vine actually is. If is it poison ivy, I suppose I will put on long pants and a long shirt and thick gloves and yank the stuff out. If not, then I will probably want to sample the berries this year. And I will also have to investigate the berry plot. Maybe there are berry bushes growing in there and maybe the bushes died.

sapphoq healing tbi says: Now that I have some distance from my car accident, I suspect that the changes in my personality and my neurological functioning bother other people a great deal more than they bother me. I don't feel like a victim. I keep striving.
     Most days I can say with some confidence this: It's good to be alive yo!

The Eyes [May] Have It

I was heartened today to see one tiny article about the possibility that visual difficulties may aid in the accurate diagnosis of traumatic brain injuries in veterans who continue having troublesome symptoms after sustaining a blast.  Psychiatrist Elaine Peskind noted that the vets she tested had irregular movements of their eyeballs.  Neuro-Optomologist Randy Kardon demonstrated that the vets exposed to blasts had retinal cells that were thinner than expected and also had developed photo-sensitivity.  [ article located here at: http://www.turnto23.com/lifestyle/health/eyes-may-provide-new-insight-into-brain-problems-including-tbi-in-soldiers ]

I've known about tbi-related eye problems because I have them.  I was diagnosed with true photophobia, ocular-motor dysfunction, and dyplopia in one eye.  The external vertigo that I experience on a daily basis [the room spins to the left] with occasional temporary upswings  is responsible for my latest back injuries which have landed me back in physical therapy.  Nystagmus, I have it now.  I did not have it pre-injury.  Misinterpretation of visual data in the brain has caused visual disturbances.  These are not frightening.  And dry eyes.  Because I no longer blink as much automatically as I used to.  Reading was not possible for me for longer than thirty minutes [and sometimes not possible after much less than thirty minutes] until the introduction of an e-reader.  It is not large print that I need.  My visual acuity is within the range of "doesn't need glasses while driving."  What I do need, and the e-reader provides for me, is more white space between words and the ability to adjust the light settings.

When hunting down the research into the use of various visual tests and measurements in the diagnosis of traumatic brain injury with our troops, the earliest reference I found was dated 2009.  This is the sort of thing that should have been reported on by the media much earlier than yesterday.  The research has implications for all of us who have sustained brain injuries from a variety of causes.

While I applaud the Veterans' Administration for the research being undertaken on behalf of soldiers who have suffered and who will continue to suffer blast injuries, it is my sincere hope that refinements to the diagnosis of a t.b.i. and delivery of services designed to address tbi-related visual difficulties does not become bogged down in the usual bureaucratic paperwork and a system which seeks to deny our vets services when at all possible.

sapphoq healing t.b.i.


Other references:

http://www.rehab.research.va.gov/jour/09/46/6/pdf/cockerham.pdf

http://www.wired.com/wiredscience/2013/05/neurologist-markam-human-brain/

http://www.army.mil/article/74675/

http://www.lowvision.org/traumatic_brain_injury.htm

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20104404

http://www.brainline.org/content/2010/02/vision-issues-after-brain-injury-brainline-talks-with-dr-gregory-goodrich_pageall.html

Three Dimensional Fun

The picture is of an open floor plan house that I created on Trimble© Sketch-Up.  I have the free version which Google© popularized.  You can find more of what I've been playing with at the 3-D Warehouse© .  My collection is called "do as you will."

Since my motor vehicle accident and resultant traumatic brain injury, I have all kinds of perception and ocular motor
problems.  These difficulties are not a result of any deficiency in my visual acuity.  [Visual Acuity is measured by the Snellen Eye Chart, how clearly one can see and results in a measurement of a/b e.g. 20/20, 20/30...  My visual acuity is very good.  I don't need glasses to drive].  But my eyes don't play nicely together or with my brain.  Consequently, I live with double vision and photophobia.  Almost nine years after my brain damage, I continue to work at cognitive exercises and puzzles daily.  One of the things I've started to play with is the free version of Trimble© Sketch-Up. 

Since around the middle of August, I have been creating three dimensional models of shapes, houses, other buildings, furniture (mainly coffee tables), and a few other random things almost daily.  And I've gotten better at it.  There are free videos available but I've found that I am better off experimenting with the toolbar myself and only resorting to watching part of a video if I get stuck on something that I am attempting.  I like making the models and found it a natural progression from making e-stationary and textures.  [Note: the textures on my house above are all included with the free version of Sketch-Up.  So they aren't textures that I've created].

I've found creating a ball to be more difficult than making any of the models in this sample of things I've done.  And creating 3D shapes (-- other than the rectangle-- rendering a successful model of a four sided di took me several hours) was harder for me to learn than how to chauffer edges.  (The surface of this kitchen table is chauffered, using a tool called "Follow Me).

 

 

 

 

I like challenging myself to learn new things, even stuff that forces my eyes and brain to work together.  And forcing myself to use my damaged brain to think in new or unfamiliar ways is a definite win.

sapphoq on healing t.b.i.